....until I am DONE, DONE, DONE work!
Yes, another countdown for me to excitedly occupy myself with...
Let me just say that I can't really complain that I have a job. Especially in these unsure times. However, for the past few months, things have slightly gone to the sh-ts and everything (in most departments; not just mine) has been put on a sort of 'hold' due to recent developments from the summer and so on. A hold where you still come in to work every day but only perform the measly tasks at hand...day in and day out. For, I dunno, 6 months straight. It has been this way for most of the office staff anyhow. And I don't really handle boredom all that well. Or feeling non-important and non-existant. I actually despise it...I've only stuck it out because of the money, the lack of other job opportunities in this place and because my husband is in the middle of his apprentice and I am waiting a few years until he is done so we can move the "H-E-double hockey sticks" outta here!
Needless to say, I've been going slightly out of my mind alternatively *trying* to focus on my literature thesis review during this "down-time", but instead have proceeded to become way too pre-occupied with this pregnancy. For example, I could have easily been busy reading and writing for my literature review but, go figure, when all in life turns stagnant so does the brain when it comes to doing a little bit of research. It has been difficult to sit and concentrate on reading (verrrry boring articles) for hours on end while feeling nautious, heartburny and freakin' hormonal. I'm not saying I couldn't have done it, I'm just saying I didn't, and that those are my (however pitiful) excuses.
So anyhow, I've got 6 more weeks left until I officially start my maternity leave...YAYYY!!! I am taking the FULL year off this time (not just 7-8 months like last time). In fact, maybe longer to spend (what I feel is) much more time and well-needed energy with my glourious and beautiful babies at home. I think they deserve more mommy-time and I obviously have been needing more baby/kid-time too. Heck, I may even start my own consulting business (later on) and work here and there, and whenever I gosh-darn feel like it!
I just figure that, even if this job is still available to me once I'm done my mat. leave, that sometimes all the money in the world just isn't worth the happiness that will continuously be seeped from my veins due to a detrimental and lagging work environment.
So anyhow, this 'revelation' is kind of ironic for me now, because 3 years ago today I was sitting in my house, actually ON maternity leave with my first beautiful baby (not even 5 months into it), and bless her soul, I was on the opposite end of the spectrum and seriously toiling and fretting on life and how important it is that I get that "perfect" job....only to realize a few months later after I *did* get the job and lived it for awhile (way too long if you ask me!) that it's just not everything in the world and is definitely not what I want anymore. Atleast not at this point in my life.
Funny how things change like that.
But I gather it's perfect timing. =)