Thinking skinny!

From July 24, 2008

My weight is still showing a lower number today...so I may get some loss this week! Will have to wait until tomorrow...until then I will have a healthiful day .

I have also started to visualize myself as the thinner, preferable version of me every nite before I go to bed. I used to do this every nite during the first time I lost all the weight (years ago just before I got preggo). I think this will help seeing as I am currently finding that I get too 'comfortable' at a certain (current) weight even though I still have about 35 pounds to go. And then, consequently, I ease off on my healthy eating and gain back a few pounds and feel heavier again.

Alas! The yo-yo effect.

It's like I'm psyching myself out of being thin...almost like I feel too scared to get thinner and the attention that comes with it. I remember with the first time I lost all the weight and all the attention I got. For someone who is super shy, that attention can be daunting. This is all pretty funny and so ironic...but really true. Honestly...in the last few months I've caught myself thinking that I shouldn't get any thinner!! Crazy, absurd sub-consciousness!! But I caught it and I'm gonna nip the damn thing in the BUD!! LOL!

The REAL truth is (the reality-based and not the sub-conscious fictions of my mind), that I'm at my wits-end, I'm literally tired of (and from) being thick, chubby and lazy and I'm not that shy anymore these days (having kids definitely helps with that, lol!) so I just don't need to use these lame excuses anymore.

Plus...my health and happiness is first and foremost! And losing these extra 35 pounds will make me a healthier and happier person, without a doubt! Without a doubt at all!! It will be SOOO worth it!

Cheers to that! (with a low-calorie drink of course, hehe)